From the late TB Joshua to EA Adebayo, there exists no shortage of religious men clamoring to prove they speak for the divine, to prove their premonitions contain truth. To counter such entitled and utterly-unfounded claims, we have curated our list of top failed prophecies in Nigeria.
The Format
“He APPEARED to me in a dream…!” “In the shower, he came to me and I said speak Great One for your servant listens…” “In the quiet, I heard his voice, an anointing upon my soul…”
We hear it time and again. The same speech, the same service. Anyone who is even remotely religious, at least enough to regularly attend meetings, knows what to expect at the turn of a new year. That’s the period clerics worldwide turn into human oracles and begin to sprout prophecies unprovoked.
Related: Skabash skabosh: Cynthia Morgan abandons music to become a prophetess
In Nigeria, the situation is even worse. It almost seems like a competition between worship places to see who gets to deliver the most accurate script. Why we have to do this every year, or even at all, goes beyond me. Would life be better without prophecies? Well, my personal opinion is better not revealed. But I would hint that there’s a high chance you don’t remember the last prophecy your religious leader gave.
Why is that, you wonder? Because while you must have shouted affirmation (“Amen!” “I hear you, Daddy!”) in the heat of the moment, your subconscious only took that prophecy with a grain of salt. It’s not as ignorant as your consciousness.
In fact, the bullshit meter your subconscious has will trump all AIs in existence, because the quality is remarkable and the result is always standard. So you don’t remember such prophecies because your subconscious naturally sees them as bunkum.
No, not bumbum. Bunkum.
Related: 10+ Reasons Why There Are So Many Churches In Nigeria
General Problems With Nigerian Prophecies
- Too vague: I feel like this is a kind of play-it-safe area for most clerics. Why predict a specific event when it might all be speculation? So they make it vague, not enough to be pointless, but certainly not apt, either. Like when one particular believer prophesied that many undeveloped projects will achieve fruition this year. I mean, during which year don’t we have projects to accomplish?
- Too statistical: Whereas some prophecies have little or no fact, some of them actually rely on so many facts you’d think their announcer was just watching the BBC news the night before. It gives a certain chance of occurrence to their prophecies and while they might not realize this, it ruins the allure of intrigue.
- Too political: This is actually the worst problem. A lot of recently-released prophecies tend to be tailored for political purposes, which is really infuriating. Because in that case, the cleric is no longer a man of faith, but a mouthpiece in some politician’s pocket.
Now, I will discuss some of the failed prophecies in Nigeria.
Related: New naira notes confusion: Church rejects old notes as tithes and offering
Top Failed Prophecies in Nigeria List 1
- This year will be a year of household thanksgiving and a difference in people’s way of life — Bishop David Oyedepo, Overseer of Living Faith Church. Well, I do not know about any fortunate differences in the lives of many Nigerians. Fuel scarcity remains at an all-time high, and to make it worse, there is a lack of electricity more than ever. We also have our problems with the new naira design which kicked off in the last quarter of 2022. I doubt many families did thanksgiving with empty bellies and darkened homes.
- 2022 is going to be a year of joy with numerous celebrations — Pastor Peterside Iyun, Founder of the God’s Temple Church (GTC). 2022 was certainly a year of celebrations, mostly among the elite. But were they numerous?
- Corona will last for seven years — Pastor Peterside Iyun, Founder of the God’s Temple Church (GTC). This prophecy died with the invention of the vaccine, and then there are certain speculations that corona might even last longer than seven years but in a less-harmful state.
- Migration will take a turn for the new year — EA Adeboye, Overseer of RCCG
- Terrible storms will wreak havoc on the Atlantic and Pacific oceans and we will be affected — EA Adeboye. Ah ahn! Daddy Yo, the weatherman! Well, so far we’re yet to see these mighty typhoons and tempests, but of course, fingers crossed.
Related: Native doctor converts to Christianity, becomes ordained Bishop at Methodist Church
Top Failed Prophecies In Nigeria List 2
- More than 80% of projects started this year will succeed — EA Adeboye, Overseer of RCCG. Remember what I said about statistical prophecies?
- Coronavirus will only kill those who are destined to die at their appointed time — Pastor Peterside Iyun, Founder of the God’s Temple Church (GTC).
- Many politicians will be indicted and be sentenced to jail — Pastor Peterside Iyun, Founder of the God’s Temple Church (GTC). Some clerics might need to retake their divination classes, because what is this outright gaffe? Many politicians are still walking around freely despite the mountain of incriminating evidence that stands against them. One is even eyeing the presidential seat.
- There won’t be a lack of money — Apostle Johnson Suleiman, Overseer of Omega Fire Ministries. I laugh in the holy tongue but will say no more.
- 2020 will be a year of perfection — Dr. Chris Oyakhilome. It wasn’t from where I stood but like I mentioned, some prophecies are too vague and even then they still fall off the mark. 2020 is likely the worst year in history, more especially for Nigerians because of the End Sars protests.
- Coronavirus will end in March 2020 — TB Joshua. Shall we move on, please?
Related: Holy Spirit instructed me – Nigerian Pastor Claims after Impregnating 20 Church Members
A Word From Battabox On Failed Prophecies
Well, given how you choose to look at it, prophecies could be canon or not. Everyone processes information in their own way, after all. I’m not against the use of prophecies, but I’d advise you not to base your expectations on them so you don’t end up disappointed.
If you have any questions, let us know below.
