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How to Break up with a Toxic Friend

Friendships are relationships that come with emotional attachment and depending on how intense and old the relationship is, it may be very difficult to break out of a friendship even though it is toxic. But here is how you can break up with a toxic friend

How to Break up with a Toxic Friend
Sad young black woman and man outdoors on street having relationship problems

Breaking out of friendships is hard. It even becomes harder if your friend doesn’t seem to realize that he is being toxic to you. It’ll make no sense to him or her why you want out.

This article is not limited to only romantic friendships. Even casual friends and old-time friends can be toxic too. If they are, you will have to retain your sanity, which means losing them.

If you are in a romantic relationship, and you feel the whole love stuff doesn’t appeal to you anymore, you may want to break up in a way that will allow a casual relationship but nothing romantic.

Maybe your girlfriend is stressing you out, but you don’t want to run out of her life, leaving her self-esteem damaged.

There’s a perfect way to get out of a toxic friendship.

And this article will list out practical ways you can break up with a toxic friend. 



What are Toxic Relationships or Friendship

A toxic relationship or friendship is characterized by continual emotional or physical abuse. 

Yes, if you’re being physically abused, you may be in a toxic relationship, and this can be noticed quickly by family or friends. However, emotional abuse and continual drain of self-esteem may not be noticed rapidly.

So first, you need to identify toxic relationships. Check out this list. If you have a friendship with one or more of these factors, it is time to look closely, ascertain your facts, and move on.

Here are some high fliers for toxic friendship

  1. Belittling
  2. Judgmental
  3. No sympathy
  4. Little or no communication
  5. Uncomfortable communication
  6. Betrayal
  7. Manipulation
  8. Coercion
  9. Violation of your rights
  10. Lack of Support
  11. Competition

They are even additional signs that will help you notice a toxic relationship. But, if your friend falls into any of these categories, then think again.

How to Break up with a Toxic Friend

How to Break up with a Toxic Friend
Dispute man and woman.

Now, to the real issue, this article wants to address “How to break up with a Toxic Friend”.

If you have noticed that you are in a toxic relationship, then it’s high time you ran out of it and run out fast. You do not deserve all the hurt and pain, besides there are millions of good people in this world, why get stuck up with one?

However, ending friendships should be done meekly and respectfully. At least you guys were once the best paddies, right?

Everyone’s heart is delicate and should be treated as such, even though they didn’t do too much for you. Plus, if everyone takes an eye for an eye, the whole world will certainly get blind.

So, below is expert advice on the best methods to break up with an unhealthy friend.


Break up in a Vocal and Respectable Way

Now, you don’t have to go screaming through the neighbourhood that you no longer want to have anything to do with someone anymore.

Neither do you have to start showing ugly nonverbal signs that you are no longer interested in being friends. 

If you’re no longer interested in a friendship, call the person aside (please do not go to your favourite location or where you met) and tell him or her why it can’t work out anymore.

Point out Something Good in the Person

Yes, believe it or leave it, you should break up with a toxic friend kindly. One of the ways is by pointing thing good about the person

You don’t need to point accusing fingers all around as if you were led into a trap when you agreed to start a relationship.

Surely there was a character that attracted you. Now is the best time to point it out slightly. You’re just trying to help his self-esteem, don’t try to get revenge.

Admit your Fault

It takes two to Tango; you should honestly share the blame if it didn’t work out. Ooh, enough of ‘after everything I did’. You did your best, yes. Admit your faults, which will help you let go in better shape.

Give an Honest Reason for the Breakup

Now, I didn’t say to accuse your friend of being a devil. I’m saying you should say what you didn’t like about the relationship, how it made you feel, and why you won’t continue.

For your sake and your friend’s sake, don’t skip this part. It is almost the hardest to do because you may pass on the wrong information if you’re not careful.

But don’t worry about passing on the wrong information. If you have made up your mind, then let your senses lead you through


Seek Advice

No one is an encyclopedia of knowledge hence you need to seek other people’s views on this matter, especially if it is a romantic relationship or something as delicate as marriage.

By allowing people to come in, there may be room for reconciliation, as people will see it in a way you can’t.

Gossiping and telling lies about that person is definitely out of the question. You will only get empty pity and wrong advice if you pursue such methods.

Avoid the Show-off Style

Show off is a strong NO when you want to break up with a toxic friend.

Once you say goodbye to a friend, give some space and time before you’re seen running off with Tom, Dick, and Harry. You may be tempted to give the ‘I’m better off without you’ vibes, but it’s better not to begin any competition with a friend who you are no longer with.

Be open to Calls and Checkups

Every broken friendship needs space to heal. You’ve got to get that space. However, the space is not for life.

Ain’t nothing wrong with a short call or text. You should also try to say hi after some time.

Ending a relationship may be difficult, but you need to make up your mind to do it if the relationship is toxic. Once you’ve made up your mind follow through with the steps given above. I wish you success.

Esther Gad
Esther Gad
I am a freelance writer, who loves to convey information through written contents. I build simple and conversational content tailored to the specific audience which can help industries build customer trust and in long term increase sales